Tag: #personal

Number Nine. Number 9.

jamie

Hey guys.
It’s been awhile
I’m not gonna get into my story right now.
Suffice to say it isn’t ending like I thought.
Again.
Numerolgy says this year was a #9.
That’s not like, one less than perfect.
It’s an ending.
Next year, we’re back to zero.
Then around we go again
2026 isn’t a 9 for everyone. It’s actually a 1.
But this isn’t a numerology lesson.
It’s more of a life lesson.
I basically spent the last decade fucking things up.
It’s also been a decade of loss. So much loss.

But
A new one now begins.
The energy shift is incredible.
It hurts. It’s exciting.
It feels different.
Different scary.
With the possibility of awesomeness.
The cycle of sorrow is over.
I am reborn.
Refreshed. Strong. -Ish.
Ready to get knocked down.
Again and again.
To keep rising up again.
Until my Source consumes me
Dilutes me into the Ocean of All
Until I evaporate into The Everywhere.

All poetry aside…
For now though,
I’ll probably keep fucking up
Different fuck ups.
Hopefully not harming
More than Helping
If you think about it,
That’s the truest balance
We can measure success by.

I’ma try and take Fred Rogers advice:
Be a Helper. We need helpers.

What I’m really trying to say is, our awesome country is in pain. We need real healing. We can’t let a few billionaires and mega-millionaires unite to control us.
We’re ALL Americans. We can come together and decide that The Haters must go. Or we can let them keep dividing us over STUPID false issues, while ignoring the suffering of America’s children.
We are being screwed. Exploited and now, plainly robbed, at the hands of disgusting, wealthy elite who prefer to add zeroes to their bank accounts, while their own full-time employees cannot afford to live without government assistance.
If you still even have a job.

The Ending is the beginning.

The end of two party, pay-to-play, rule by the elite. The beginning of REAL democracy. Yes, the END of The Republic. The start of The Democracy. The end of control by the elite.
I’d rather be controlled by data from experts, and close to unanimous decisions about things that matter. To The People. To US, not THEM.

It’s About everyone having food in the wealthiest nation on earth.
Medicine, without profit. Doctors and medical staff should be well paid, and research should be well funded. By our taxes, instead of funding endless war. And then medical services should be FREE. We already paid for them with our taxes.

Profit for Big Pharma doesn’t make research happen. Research makes rich people a LOT of profit. Most of our research still happens in universities, funded by government grants. We should keep doing that. But…
If our taxes fund the research, the profit should benefit the people. Free medicine. Advances in drugs. New cures for ALL, not just rich people.
But instead, it gets sold for profit. Often for corporations that pay little or no taxes on their profits. Because politicians don’t care, unless we are united.
We all need to wake up. Both parties in America don’t want that. They want us divided, so they can keep fucking us. That’s the bottom line.
So they can keep getting rich by spending our tax dollars any way they like. Then they make us blame each other for their social crimes of greed and cruelty to others.
You see…It’s about our tax dollars going to help people who need help. It’s about We The People deciding what’s important to US
Affordable food.
Good medicine for all.
Good roads
Great schools
Clean air
Guns under control. A well-regulated militia.
Promote Harmony, not blame and violence
Peace before war. ALWAYS.
Helping, not harming.
These fuckers don’t know the meaning.
They are not the magnanimous wealthy of olde, building museums and libraries
They ban books, and defund schools.
Let people suffer when they could help.
They preach violence as gospel.
Might makes right.
Sometimes they use an angry God to back them up. Then they call themselves Christians.

Don’t get me started about Christianity Vs. Jesus. That’s a whole ‘nother conversation.


I’d rather talk about the future, not History.
Don’t get me wrong, I love history.
But now it must become a guide to our future.
Truth in history is truth in our future.
Not lies, and propaganda. Spin pieces, they call em. Junk media, on both sides. Another topic I could rant on for hours. Not now.
Timing is everything.
Now is about unity.
If you hate the other side, there’s no place for you here in the New America. It’s not about blaming the other side. That “other side” is people like you. Just struggling to get by. It’s not THEM.
Know they enemy. It’s about the fucking rich bastards that won’t give back to the country that made them rich. It’s about justice. Truth.  The American Way. All that bullshit they fed you in school that really did used to mean something. In MY lifetime. I’m old, but it wasn’t THAT long ago.

So…Power to The People, America.
It’s about US.
A new American Age is rising.
From the ashes of the obviously corrupt, violent, and hateful oligarchy, our Democracy will Rise.
Not a Phoenix. That’s so cliche.
No, more like a Dragon.
Awaking from slumber. Hibernation.
Remembering we can fly.
And Yeah…breathe fire, if we must.
Emergency use only. Aim carefully.
Hate has no place in the New America.

Creativity and Moody Muses

jamie

A lot of creative people I know seem to create constantly. Some people claim you have to force yourself to write daily.

Me, I don’t think you should force yourself to do anything, and my muses would only get angry at me for abusing their good nature. I’ve come to appreciate the long periods of nothing as rest between the motherlode dumps. It’s almost seasonal, except the seasons are random and droughts frequent. But I’m NOT complaining.

Muses are Everywhere

True Creativity is a gift. It comes from inside, but also from someplace else. Muses. Belligerent as they are generous, if you try and steal their gifts for gain. For Profit. For me, anyway.

I don’t think it’s wrong to make a career of music. But for ME, the career part doesn’t make sense. I don’t want to sell you something. I just want you to listen, if it makes you feel something. Anything. Otherwise, fuck off. Seriously.

Because having a great beat and fun lyrics isn’t a bad. I’ve had many great nights that were just plain fucking good FUN. But I also think there has to be more to the music (or at least a lot of xstasy). Listening to music without feeling something besides the driving bass, leaves a whole realm of emotions unfelt. Buried. Seems empty. Noisy.

There are millions of artists streaming their work, and some of them really grab your attention, for diverse and spectacular reasons. Then there is a lot of noise. A LOT. Amongst all the noise, I try to offer back the gifts I’ve received.

If you are chosen by fate to find my music, and it actually reaches you…makes you feel something, then we are probably kindred spirits. Touched by the same demons and dragons. Dazed by the beauty, hope and sadness of it all, and frustrated by humanity’s stagnation on the road to evolved existence. There’s a lot of those themes in my songs, even if you don’t hear them the first time.

But I mean…How fucking hard is it to love each other, learn to feed everyone, and stop fighting over real estate, money, and power? Why is it so difficult rein in the entitlement of the elite overlords who use division to bend history for their own benefit, while depriving much of mankind of the benefits of unity and the resources of a bountiful planet?

Elite Carrot Overlord

Anyway, thanks for reading. Thanks for listening. In peace and hope. ~j

Roads Not Forgotten

jamie

It feels kinda like coming out. Not from the closet, but from a self-imposed isolation. From my cave, so to speak. Hibernation for self-survival. That’s why I’ve been avoiding it. Coming out, I mean. Maybe I’ll stay here forever.
I haven’t been quiet. I post a lot. Shouting into the void, really. I’m…Just not social. In real life, I don’t talk to most of the people I think of as friends.

Old friends of mine are off, living their lives. Or dying, in a few cases. As a theme, Death is becoming more frequent in my life. So, well I don’t ask about their lives. They don’t ask about mine. We’re both satisfied, living in our memories. I guess. Or maybe we are just scared of hearing bad news.

You can ask. It’s ok. No, I’m not dying. Just reflecting. At 63, I’m not ignoring the obvious either. Nothing is forever. Except memories, I think.

If you think about it, well, memories are all we have. We each spend our lives collecting them. We cultivate them, in part to understand them. To make us feel better. And it works. Until it doesn’t. I’m pretty sure old friends don’t remember things exactly the same way I do. Details may be blurred. Maybe we don’t remember them at all. Because we each shape our own memory.

Memories are therefore fleeting and ever changing, blurring the past and future, tainted by the present. It seems as if almost any scenario in the past is now plausible. If someone from back then challenges my current reality by telling me I did something insane that I don’t remember, should I believe them? At this point I would, probably. If it sounds plausible. There were some CRAZY times.

Back in the real world, the once unthinkable keeps happening. Again and again. Some days I assume the world must surely be departing it’s axis, and spinning off into the void. Chaos is everywhere, it seems. Plausible? Every scenario seems “plausible” anymore.

But not here. Here on the farm, all the chaos spins around me. Here I am frozen in this moment. This place. This magic place, in the middle of nowhere, Upstate NY. Three hours from everywhere, on the border of sanity and oblivion.
I enjoy just being here. I plan to enjoy the peace of this place until my last breath (hopefully not any time soon). I treasure the love and company of my wife, and all of our animals caretakers. We may feed these beasts and birds, but they take care of us. Our nest will never be empty, though our path and the paths of our loved ones may diverge from our shared journeys.

I will forever recall the ones who made a difference in my reality; friends who walked alongside me on my journey to Here. This precarious perch of Reflection. Never forgotten, as we all fade into the future. Together apart.

I’m not sure we were ever on the same journey. Perhaps our paths crossed for a moment or two in time. But now, time has dragged us each through our own separate battlefields. The minutes we shared have been aggregated into moments. Key scenes and trailers of our lives, rather than the actual footage. Replayed less frequently, as each of our libraries keep growing. Faded, but not erased.

So what can we do, but journey on, together in our fleeting, ever-archiving memories? If we’re lucky, we may meet again. Maybe this Ride never ends, or maybe one day we’ll travel together around this sun again, for a little while more. But even if the stars explode and the planets all die, the memories of the journeys we shared are forever written into the DNA of the Universe.

“Two roads diverged in a wood, and I— I took the one less traveled by, And that has made all the difference.”
~Robert Frost – The Road Not Taken

Flashback 2018 – Did I Say That?

jamie
It’s about the future, not the fear.

‘Life’s unexpected turns and twists are what make being human interesting. Don’t fear the unknown…plan for the future the best you can, and then run forward into it, with open eyes, mind and heart.’ ~jg

I don’t remember sharing this thought two years ago, but according to Facebook I did. It sounds like something I’d say, so I guess I believe it. I’m also a little too lazy to actually scroll back to check.

Anyway, it seems even more appropriate now, as we’re trying to vaccinate our way out of The 2020 Pandemic. COVID-19 has proven to be an unexpected twist like no other, an abrupt turn of events that literally brought our lives to a standstill. You can’t plan for these things. Or live in fear of the next one. You can only hope to survive. To stay safe and healthy. So you can run forward into another new day after this one, with hope for the future, however unexpected it may become.

I hope everyone stays safe and well. Wear a mask, even if you’ve gotten the shots. Wash your hands. Be kind. ~jg

#NoFear #WearAMask #COVID19

#Vote We did it, and it felt really fucking good. Like multiple orgasms for the political libido. Just what the plague doctor ordered. #JustDoIt #Election2020 #WearAMask ?

jamie

#Vote
We did it, and it felt really fucking good. Like multiple orgasms for the political libido.
Just what the plague doctor ordered.
#JustDoIt #Election2020 #WearAMask ?

https://bit.ly/37EFDCP